Thursday, June 22, 2006
Heylo people,Trying to mug late into the night but its obviously not working lol. Getting distracted by the smallest things and spending time just stoning and thinking about all that has happened to me so far this year.
Anyway shall write down some of my thoughts...hmmm how do i start...
Well i guess you guys would have noticed by now that i was absent from school for about 2 weeks during the month of may right? Well if you didn't notice i did!!! For those that still do not know, i was in New Zealand. Now this is something that a lot of you guys do not know...Why i was there...
Hahaha i guess i wasn't really lying when i told you that i was there for a family thingy. To be honest, i was there for my sister's 21st birthday. Lol quite a few would now be thinking i'm mad going all the way there for two weeks, missing school missing my rugby tournament, just to see my sister on her birthday but i guess you have to understand the context. For my family it was more than just a birthday celebration, it was finally a chance to get together. My dad and i had been counting and we came to the conclusion that it has been a full 4 years since my family last got together lol. That would have been since i was 14!!! haha and that had only been for a month i wonder how long it was before that...sigh too depressing to count lol.
Anyway being apart from my family for so long has made me come to realise just how important my family is to me. Till this trip i hadn't seen my dad for two years and when i finally met him i had so much to tell him and yet i didn't know how to say it. He definitely has changed a lot and so have i. It was so weird for the first week, my dad and i where trying to find each other again, the role that we are supposed to play in each other's lives. Than when the whole family got together that was even weirder. We spent a grand total of 40 hours together over the weekend before my brother had to fly back for school, and during this time the first night was easily spent trying to grasp the family lifestyle again. Sitting around watching tv, the next morning waking up and having breakfast together, all these simple pleasures in life were suddenly back with me again. When he left it was such a sad event, i had rarely seen my brother or my father cry for that matter but there we were all 5 of us tearing at the final farewell, how do you put it, the time we spent together just seemed so inadequate.
So i guess i have come to realise the importance of family, when i was a small boy i hated the idea, i questioned my parents love for me and i rebelled. As i got older i questioned why i studied what was the point, what was i studying for, i resented the idea that all along i had actually been studying so that i won't get scolded by my parents. Than by the time i came to realise just what family meant to me it was too late...looking back at the years my family had never been really put together right, all through the years either one of my two parents were missing in my life, a busy work schedule, being sent overseas and now New Zealand. When either of them came back from a long stint away they would always be scolding me trying to cram whatever they wanted to tell me into those few weeks...My childhood could easily have fit into one of those broken family type of situations, sigh things could have gone so wrong for me...but what held me back from going down that route of self-destruction till today i still do not know...all i know now is that my family is out there in the world and no matter whatever it is that i do i am never alone...
What does family mean to you? Cherish it while it still last...don't only realise it when you no longer have your family around you like i did...
Adam
-duty-
1:06 AM
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